Thursday, August 5, 2010

Shaq Celtic: the Big Leprechaun's road to Boston

 Shaquille O'Neal was one of the greatest Lakers of all time, one of the founding fathers of NBA hip hop, one of the first NBA movie stars and one of sports' greatest gab & media masters since Muhammad Ali. Shaq is now joining forces with Kevin Garnett, Paul Pierce, Ray Allen and Jermaine O'Neal in Boston to turn the Celtics into the Big Geezers. The Big Leprechaun era is here. 
 Shaq is now fully in his Ewing in Seattle, Olajuwon in Toronto phase. Big, strong old guy who is still better than Chris Dudley or Kwame Brown, but a fraction of the unstoppable juggernaut he was in his prime. At this point, journeyman Kurt Thomas is more sought after at center than Shaq. 
 Shaq came into the NBA breaking backboards in ways that probably had Darryl Dawkins yelling "Chocolate Thunder Spawn!" at his TV.  With the Orlando Magic, Shaq had Penny Hardaway and Penny had Lil Penny. O'Neal continued Michael Jordan's tradition of making Horace Grant look better than he was. The Magic humanized Jordan and the Bulls in 6 games before Olajuwon made Shaq look like a lost boy in the finals. 
 Shaq left Orlando & the Magic got nothing back after their 4 years with him was up. The franchise faltered with Penny as their best player and then fell into the abyss of Tracy McGrady's underachievements. 
 Shaq found increased fame & fury in LA. For 8 seasons, he played most of his best basketball alongside Kobe Bryant. After a few years of regular season promise before playoff failures, the arrival of coach Phil Jackson turned the Lakers into a 3 peat dynasty. 
 Yet there was no love between Shaq and Kobe. Their distaste for each other led the Lakers to trade Shaq to Miami making Kobe happier than he'd been since his criminal charges were dropped.
 Then stuff got really weird with Shaq rhyming onstage to Kobe and asking him questions that Shaq's wife probably has a better idea how to answer.
 Shaq evolved in Miami. Instead of dominating the environment as he'd done with Penny & Kobe, Shaq coexisted with Dwyane Wade in a way that brought out the best in both players on the court. Wade made a faster adjustment to Shaq's game than any of the greats Shaq played with. 
 In his first year with the Heat in '04-'05, O'Neal showed that he was still the best center by posting the highest FG percentage of his career, .601. With 22.9 ppg and 10.4 rpg, Shaq led the Heat to 17 more wins than their previous year and into the conference finals. He arguably should've won the MVP had the media not been so infatuated with Steve Nash's offensive skills.
  The Big Diesel started losing gas in Miami and they traded him to play with boy wonder Steve Nash. The Canadian guard may look back on this period as his punishment for having won an MVP award he didn't deserve. The only time Nash's assists dipped below 10 per game in Phoenix was during O'Neal's one full season. The only time a Nash led team didn't make the playoffs was also in his one year with Shaq.
 No chemistry, no love, no success.
 The Suns traded Shaq to the Cavs to play with the self-appointed god of Akron, LeBron James. Shaq took Ilgauskas' starting job and the Cavs finished with the best record in the NBA for the regular season. Yet this Shaq wasn't anywhere near Laker Shaq or even Heat Shaq. This Shaq played just 23 mpg and scored 12 quiet points and grabbed 6.7 random rebounds per night. No dominance and no ability to take over games.
 The Cavs sputtered out in the playoffs against the Celtics with Kendrick Perkins' defense rising above the ineffective offense of O'Neal. Cavs coach Mike Brown then switched Shaq to guard Kevin Garnett who buried practically open jumpers on the lumbering giant's watch. Shaq's offense was minimal and his defense was pregnable. The Celtics capitalized. 
 Now the Big Aristotle, the Big Shaqtus and Shaq Fu is the Big Leprechaun with the Big Geezers. He may be coming off the bench to spell Jermaine O'Neal. Father time is a cruel SOB. 
 A Laker great making his last stand with the Celtics. Big Baby playing with the guy who hooked him up with LSU. Paul Pierce playing with the guy who nicknamed him "The Truth." 
Shaquille O'Neal is a Boston Celtic. 
    


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